Posts
I've been reading a lot of other blogs lately, mainly blogs about pregnancy loss and stillbirth. I've noticed a push for "sassy" blogs and blogs that bash religious affiliations, faith in God, and pro-life belief systems. I realize I'm opening myself up to criticism here. While I find myself in a fragile state these days, I'm still compelled to make a statement about such blogs: I can't relate.
I don't understand how women can want a child so badly, yet see no connection to God or the sanctity of life. We live in a society that does not value life. What I've learned is that many people reproduce simply to achieve their own goals. Selfish goals. Once they've succeeded in reproducing, the baby goes to daycare as soon as possible so the parents can continue to achieve their own professional, social, and fitness goals. Baby might appear in pictures on the parents' desks and websites. Perhaps baby, dressed as if prepared for a photo shoot, makes a cameo appearance at certain social events. Social events providing optimal opportunities to display baby's beauty, created (and achieved) by the parents.
I began the layout for this blog in April 2008. I planned on blogging about life as an educated, intentionally unemployed stay-at-home mom. I never wrote a word. In November 2008, my fourth child was born still. Because I lost my precious baby girl, my blog specifically evolved into: life after losing a child to stillbirth. P.S. Four months later, add cancer to the subject matter.
About Me
- Mommy (You can call me OM)
- Stay-at-Home Mommy; Wife; Attachment Parenting Follower; Animal Lover; Daughter; Sister; Catholic; Yogi; Lawyer (according to the Bar Examiners, anyhow!); Perfectionist who can't even come up with a satisfactory description because it just MIGHT have an error
Life Events
Feb 1973
My mother gave birth to me
March 1996
Adopted our "first baby" - our dog, H
Jan 1998
My husband and I married
Jan 2002
I gave birth to my first child, L
July 2003
Adopted our cats, S & L2
Mar 2004
I gave birth to my second child, O
Sept 2006
I gave birth to my third child, N
Dec 2007
Our "first baby" - our dog, H, died
Oct 2008
Adopted our dog, C
Nov 2008
I gave birth to my fourth child, E, born still
March 2009
I was diagnosed with th.y.r.oid ca.nc.er
My mother gave birth to me
March 1996
Adopted our "first baby" - our dog, H
Jan 1998
My husband and I married
Jan 2002
I gave birth to my first child, L
July 2003
Adopted our cats, S & L2
Mar 2004
I gave birth to my second child, O
Sept 2006
I gave birth to my third child, N
Dec 2007
Our "first baby" - our dog, H, died
Oct 2008
Adopted our dog, C
Nov 2008
I gave birth to my fourth child, E, born still
March 2009
I was diagnosed with th.y.r.oid ca.nc.er
My Blog List
Blog Archive
A Small Victory
Please click to help bereaved parents
Have you lost a child to stillbirth?
Helpful Links & Advocacy
- A Small Victory
- Butterfly Haven
- First Candle
- Glow in the Woods
- International Stillbirth Alliance - Research
- Light a Candle
- Lost and Found
- March of Dimes
- My Forever Child
- Office for Prevention of Prematurity and Stillbirths
- SANDS - PREGNANCY AND INFANT LOSS AWARENESS & SUPPORT
- SHARE - Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support Group
- Silent Grief
- Stepping Stones
- Still No More - News Articles
- Stillbirth Collaborative Research Network
- String of Pearls
- Sue-Ella Signatures
- Sufficient Grace Ministries
- Thomas's Story
- Tommy's
- UK SANDS
My blog map
2 comments:
Hi there OM - this is Monica popping over from KuKd. Any post that begins with "opening myself up to criticism" is a wonderful one, and this one is no exception!
When I read your thoughts, I thought of my own blog. As a non-religious person from a non-religious family, I've never had much tolerance for people who preach to me about anything (religious and non-religious alike, like buying Amway products and whatnots). And, after losing my son to stillbirth, I got even more resistant to preachiness than before.
I think - if I'm reading your post correctly - that you are grouping "appreciation (or sanctity) of life" with "belief in god." If that's correct, that would be the part where I disagree. I believe that one can worship and love and appreciate one's child, and not throw then in daycare, even if one does not believe in god. I do not have a child, but I have many religion-less friends with babies. They stay at home with their babies and love them very much. Likewise, I have people in my family (not immediate) who ARE very religious, and yet - don't seem to love or appreciate their kids very much. So, I guess I don't see a connection between the two.
One thing I do agree with, though, is that there are a lot of blogs out there that make me shake my head and go, "can't relate!" Heck, sometimes I look at my own blog and wonder where my head was when I wrote what I wrote. :-)
Peace,
Monica L.
Hi Monica,
I can see how you got the impression that I think people who don't believe in God or who are without religion cannot properly love and raise children, especially because I don't have a firm grasp on my own opinion.
I think what I was addressing might have many layers, not all of them connected. Upon becoming pregnant, I love the human being inside of me. Not just the idea of a future baby. I love the very soul of that child. While I'm devastated by the loss of a future with E, my greatest devastation is that a life was lost.
I do firmly believe in God and it's difficult to imagine myself taking credit for all the goodness in my life. It's also difficult to imagine going through life's struggles without a faith in God. I don't consider myself evangelical in any sense. I'm not out to convert anybody. But, I cannot wrap my head around a mindset that denies God's existence, especially upon seeing and holding a baby. Dead or alive.
Post a Comment